Social distance sexting
The COVID-19 pandemic has changed so many parts of our lives. Even if things return to some semblance of normal, the effects will be long-lasting.
One of the ways we were influenced together was how we socialize and especially how we date or how we meet.
Casual sex no more
Gone are the days when we could go to a party or a bar and bring someone home to frolic in the sack.
There is so much more to consider when you decide to have sex with someone.
For people who are already in a relationship, many partners spend increasingly longer periods or distances – looking for options.
This is where good old fashioned sexting comes in.
While it is difficult not to have access to physical intimacy with someone, we need to use what we have and “social distance sex,” “sexting,” “phone sex,” or whatever term you choose to use, are valuable ways to we can have sexual interactions while the pandemic is still being watched.
Schedule time to be intimate
Coordinating the times to have sex with someone you can see in person can be difficult enough. Now add distance to the mix and this will further complicate the situation.
While spontaneity can be sexy for sure, having a specific date and time that you’ll get it … virtual can help.
This will give you time to prepare, set the mood, take care of yourself like taking a bath, massaging yourself, and dressing in something sexy.
You can still have foreplay
Just because there is distance between you doesn’t mean you have to jump straight into what you consider the “main event” to be.
Socially distant sex is cool in the sense that it expands our idea of what sex is outside of the heteronormative notion of penetration.
You can take the sweet, sweet time to describe your surroundings, how you feel the flickering of candles in your room, what it feels like to rub oil into your body, what it tastes like to nibble on strawberries.
Get creative! You can decide what sex means to you, and distance makes the challenge all the more exciting.
Socially distant sex doesn’t have to be about orgasms. When you stop focusing on orgasms, you and your partner can come into contact and experience joy in new and novel ways.
Work in your comfort zone
Not everyone is going to feel comfortable having video sex, sending nudes, or even going beyond “sexting” – that’s fine.
Do what makes you comfortable, what makes you excited, and beyond that, don’t let anyone press you.
Watch porn together
If you or your partner is interested in porn, you can try and find one of the great ethical porn sites out there.
Tune in at the same time and communicate via SMS, phone, Facetime, etc by * um * commenting and talking about what turns you on in the video and what you do while watching it!
If you are comfortable with it, you can also create your own porn or sexy videos and send them to each other.
Do you or your partner have any fantasies to incorporate into the video? Make it fun, get inspired, it’s like a sexy art project!
We love sex toys here.
Sextech innovations have given remote sex a whole new element with app and remote-controlled vibrators.
A quick Google search for “long-range vibrator” or “app-based vibrator” will reveal a variety of options with appropriate ratings. These allow for more interaction and receptivity, with someone else’s excitement reigning.
You have mail
Snail mail is not out of date.
You can have a sexy pen pal too. Try sending them a handwritten erotic fantasy or memory. They can add sexy pictures or a treat to try like lingerie or a surprising sex toy.
If you are nervous …
It’s okay to be nervous! Your partner might think the same way. Especially if it’s a new person.
Nerves can only mean excitement. Sex of any kind is exciting, especially if it’s been a while.
You can practice talking dirty to yourself in the mirror just to get going.
Also, let your partner know that you are nervous. This can be a great way to break the ice.
Whatever you do, just have fun with it.
Just like with face-to-face sex, be communicative about what you want, when something works or not for you, and when there are things you want to do all over again or more. Socially distant sex can help improve your communication skills around sex, especially if you plan to have sex with someone in real life.
While these tips can’t replace the need for physical interaction, they can still be a great way to deepen your connection with someone and have fun while you’re at it!