The Fact About XY: The Risks and Advantages of the Male – Half 1

No one will forget the pandemic that hit the world in 2020 and will continue into 2021, nor will we forget the attack on the Capitol on January 6, 2021. But to understand these events and the implications for the future of our country and our world, we must accept the reality that most of those directly affected were men.

Sharon Moalem, MD, PhD: “As the coronavirus continues to spread across borders, oceans and continents, there is confusing data that has so far eluded any correct explanation: In almost every country we have numbers for, more men than Women die from the virus. “At the GenderSci Lab at Harvard, they report:” When COVID-19 swept the globe, it killed many more men than women. “

In his seminal book The Better Half: On the Genetic Superiority of Women, Dr. Moalem: “Two X chromosomes offer a strong survival advantage and men only have one. As a result, genetic women triumph over men when it comes to resilience, intellect, endurance, immunity, and more. “

Most of us have repeatedly watched videos of the Capitol attack. We don’t need any scientific studies to discover that most of the attackers had an XY pair of chromosomes (i.e. were male) in every cell in their body, and most of those who risked their lives to defend themselves against the attacks were it also male. There is already a Wikipedia page entitled “2021 Storming of the United States Capitol” that sums up the tragedy:

  • Deaths – 4 rioters, 1 policeman during the first attack. A DC police officer and a Capitol police officer committed suicide in the following days.
  • Injuries – Unknown number of rioters injured, at least 5 rioters hospitalized. 65 DC Metro police officers injured. 73 Capitol police officers injured, including at least 15 in hospital.

Much more will be announced in the months and years to come. Today I am very sad and sad about all those affected – men, women, children. But I want to turn our attention to the men and what we can learn to prevent such tragedies from happening in the future.

To understand the present and the future, we need to go back to the past. For more than fifty years I have devoted my professional life to helping men and their families. The journey began for me on November 21, 1969 when I held my newborn son Jemal in my arms and swore to him that I would be a different kind of father than my father could be to me and do all I could to create a world where men were fully healed and families were fully supported.

I regularly write articles on my website MenAlive.com every week. I also write articles for The Good Men Project, Medium, and other online venues. I have an extensive library in my California home that I often refer to when writing. To begin this investigation, I will quote from Dr. Herb Goldberg’s book The Dangers of Male Being: Surviving the Myth of Male Privilege, first published in 1976:

Goldberg says:

“The man has paid a high price for his male privilege and power. He has no contact with his emotions and his body. He plays according to the rules of the male game board and destroys himself with a lemming-like goal – emotionally, mentally and physically. ”

It still surprises me that his was written 45 years ago. Goldberg goes on to describe the underlying dangers of men’s social success.

“Our culture is saturated with successful male zombies, business man zombies, golf zombies, sports car zombies, Playboy zombies, etc. They have a lot of contact with their feelings and awareness of themselves as humans or run away from them. They have mistaken their social masks for their essence and self-destruct while satisfying traditional definitions of male appropriate behavior. They are the heroes, the stallions, the providers, the warriors, the Reichsbauer, the fearless. “

In 1979 Tom Sipes invited Goldberg to give a lecture. I was one of the men who was there. Following the talk, Tom invited any men interested in joining a men’s group to discuss Goldberg’s ideas to meet at his home on Thalia Street in Mill Valley. I joined fifteen other men who met on Wednesday after the conversation on Saturday. A men’s group was formed that night, and we will meet 42 years later.

While there are certainly men who have broken away from their true centers of power and become zombies in business, sports, sex, etc., there are also healthy and helpful business people, athletes, and family men. The world still needs heroes, providers, warriors, imperial farmers and the fearless.

What we saw in Washington DC on January 6, 2021, was the polarity of masculinity we see in the world today. There were men who were consumed by complaint and anger, who believed in lies, and exercised their pain by attacking those who they believed had wronged them. There were also men who risked their lives to protect the innocent, the values ​​of our country and the representatives of our democracy.

We see men at the extremes – both positive and negative, helpful and hurtful, violent and peaceful, at the top of society and at the end. In his book “Is There Something Good About Men?” How cultures thrive through the exploitation of men, the social psychologist Roy F. Baumeister points out this important polarity in men.

It’s easy to spot men at the top. Most world rulers, presidents and prime ministers are male. Most large company CEOs are male. Most members of Congress and Parliaments are male. Most Supreme Court justices are male. Many who point to male privilege fail to realize that men are also at the bottom.

Baumeister extends our point of view:

“If you look down at the bottom of society instead, you usually find men there too. Who in the whole world is in prison as criminals or political prisoners? The death row population has never turned to 51% women. Who is homeless Again mostly men. Who does society use for bad or dangerous jobs? US Department of Labor statistics report that 93% of people killed at work are men. Likewise, who is killed in battle? Even in today’s American Army, which has placed great emphasis on gender integration and drawing women into combat, the risks are not the same. “

Those who believe that men have all the privileges in society do not see that there are men both below and above. Those who believe that men are discriminated against, that women have privileges and that men are at a disadvantage do not see that men are also in top positions. We need to recognize both the dangers and the advantages of being a man.

In Part 2, I’ll examine the evolution of gender, why men are at the extremes, the future of manhood, and how we can find balance in our polarized world. I am looking forward to read your comments. Please visit me on my blog for more.

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